


Sweet Revenge

by Reidemption (Charlie_Remington)



Category: Criminal Minds
Genre: Blind Date, Fluff, M/M, Revenge, Scheming Morgan, Scheming Rossi, Valentine's Day
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-02-17
Updated: 2016-02-17
Packaged: 2018-05-21 04:15:12
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,616
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6037690
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Charlie_Remington/pseuds/Reidemption
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Morgan makes plans for Reid on Valentine's Day believing that he needs to get over his crush on their boss. Unbeknownst to him, Rossi does the same thing for Hotch. Unfortunately, what they had planned to do backfires and blows up in their faces.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Sweet Revenge

**Author's Note:**

> I know, a few days late, but I wrote most of it on Valentine's Day. I enjoy scheming team, but I decided to take a different spin on it this time. Hope you guys like it! ~

Derek Morgan was heading to the BAU kitchenette to pour himself a cup of coffee when he heard it. Reid’s laughter. He looked around the corner to see Reid and Hotch standing there, off to the side. Hotch was telling a story it seemed, gesturing and speaking rapidly and Reid was just taking it all in. He was focusing so intently on what their boss was saying, smiling and laughing with a brightness Morgan seldom heard.

When Morgan walked around the corner to the coffee pot, neither of them noticed him. That wasn’t uncommon. Sometimes, it seemed like Hotch and Reid were in their own little world, especially when they were profiling together. It wasn’t that they were ignoring the others, they were just so focused on each other that they hardly noticed when others spoke or entered the room. It was actually a little creepy just how well they worked together. No matter what Reid was talking about, Hotch seemed to keep up even when others had completely lost Reid’s train of thought.

Morgan watched the two men for a second longer before leaving. In that second, he took in how close they were standing. Reid didn’t like anyone in his personal space, and yet he let Hotch into it nearly every day without even blinking. And it seemed that Reid was choosing to sit next to Hotch on the jet as often as the opportunity presented itself.

Morgan shook his head in annoyance as he sat down at his desk. His friend had a huge crush on the boss and Morgan was determined to help him get over it. Valentine’s Day was just around the corner and he didn’t want Reid to be sitting at home moping about his unrequited love when he could be out having fun.

He opened up a browser and began searching the internet for something that would help. Then he remembered something. A friend of his had given him her card when they had met up by chance several weeks ago. She had an upscale restaurant that catered to couples. And every Valentine’s Day they had an event for singles who were looking for love. For a small entry fee the customer would be linked to a personality profile online and be matched up with another customer. Morgan dug out the card and called up his friend, turning on the charm in order to get Reid in.

At the end of the day, Morgan approached Reid and handed him a piece of paper with a website URL and access code.

“What’s this?” Reid asked, looking up at Morgan.

“That, is your ticket to some lovin’ on Valentine’s, Pretty Boy,” Morgan said.

“Excuse me?” Reid asked, a furrow appearing between his brows.

“I know a girl, she runs this restaurant and every year they have a singles night on Valentine’s Day. You go to that website and use the login. Then you answer questions which will then be matched up with other people in the database and you’ll receive an email confirming the time and the table you’re assigned to. Simple as that,” Morgan explained, sitting on Reid’s desk.

“Morgan, you know as well as I do that personality matches are useless. They’re based on hobbies and temperament that can create a false sense of overinflated attraction due to having things in common. Generally, it’s much more advisable to find someone who has one or two similar interests to create a baseline of connection, but also someone extremely different from you in order to be introduced to new things and ways of thinking. There can be people that have nothing in common that fall in love and people who should be perfect matches that can’t stand each other. Why did you do this?” Reid said, seemingly glaring at the paper.

Morgan knew that Reid wouldn’t back out now that he’d done it, though he wouldn’t be happy about it. “I did it, because you need to let loose and have some fun. I know what you’ve been feeling lately, and you need to get out. And now there’s no pressure about finding a someone to go out with or impressing them. It’s just a blind date and you’re not that invested. If it goes well, you may get a little lovin’ if it doesn’t, no problem, right?” Morgan reasoned.

Reid sighed. “All right,” he agreed.

“That’s my man,” Morgan said, ruffling Reid’s hair before turning and leaving for the night.

* * *

 

Rossi formed his plan during a meeting in the round table room. There wasn’t a case, they were just meeting to discuss some news and institutions that Cruz had gotten from the higher ups. He watched as Hotch sat down next to Reid, leaning over to bump their shoulders together and offer a smile.

Rossi didn’t think he’d seen Hotch smile at anyone more than he smiled at Reid. It was mildly nauseating.

And don’t even mention the intense stare that Hotch only reserved for the genius. Whenever Reid was talking, Hotch was looking at him with such intensity, it was like he feared missing something. If Reid noticed, he never said anything. He suspected that Reid just thought that was how Hotch looked at everyone, but Rossi probably would’ve decked Hotch by now if he looked at him like that. It looked as if Hotch was always a second away from just dragging Reid off to a hotel to have his way with him.

Rossi sighed and tried to focus on what Cruz was saying, but out of the corner of his eye he could still see Hotch who was angled towards Reid and seemed to be unconsciously doing everything possible to make their hands or legs brush together.

Rossi decided he needed to get his friend’s mind off of his much younger subordinate. The senior profiler had been in a similar situation years ago, and it never ended well. He needed to save Hotch before he did something stupid like confess his feelings to the oblivious object of his affections.

When he was back in his office later, he remembered an ad that he’d seen in the paper. He immediately dialed the number and mentioned that he’d donate a good sum of money to the restaurant if he could get a friend of his in this late in the game. Needless to say, they were only too happy to take him up on the offer.

He knocked on Hotch’s office door later that day.

“Hey, Dave. What can I do for you?” Hotch asked, continuing to sign some papers.

“Will you check your email?” Rossi asked.

Hotch looked up at him with a questioning expression but did as told. He clicked on something and read it.

“Dave, what the hell is this?” Hotch asked, not looking away from the screen.

“It’s your plans for Valentine’s,” Rossi answered.

“I was going to spend that day with Jack,” Hotch said, finally looking up at him.

“Don’t worry. I already called Jessica and talked to him. He’s going to come over to my place and JJ is going to drop Henry and Michael off so that she and Will can have a night out together. They’ll have a sleepover in my living room. Though, I’m sure JJ will want to come pick up Michael, but Jack and Henry have already planned to stay the night. You deserve to take a break, get rid of some of your tension. You need to get back on the horse,” Rossi said.

“And you think the best way to do that is by going to some program that promotes personality matches as genuine science? This thing is perfect for attracting predators,” Hotch complained.

“Aaron, you’re a federal agent. And besides, the scariest thing you may possibly have to face is an overaggressive lonely woman with five cats. Just go, as a favor to me. You need a night out,” Rossi continued.

Hotch sighed, “Fine, I’ll go,” he agreed.

“You won’t regret it,” Rossi said.

“Somehow I doubt that,” Hotch mumbled under his breath.

* * *

 

Reid sighed as he opened up the questionnaire and started looking through the questions with the directions _Check all that apply and write as many answers as apply_.

  1. I am a ___ male ___ female seeking a ___ male ___ female
  2. I am ___ years of age and would prefer someone between the ages of ___
  3. In my spare time, I like to…



The questions went on like that for a while. Though some of the more interesting ones made Reid blush or laugh depending on the subject matter. It was excruciating as he tried not to think about what type of people this event would attract.

Eventually, he finished the questionnaire and a message popped up. _Thank you! Your answers are being tabulated. Expect an email within 48 hours of your date._

Reid leant forward until his forehead smacked on the desk. This was going to be a disaster.

* * *

 

Hotch sat in his designated booth. His back was to where his date was going to come in. He knew that if he were facing that direction he would profile everyone that walked through the door. He was dressed down for the evening, not by much but enough that he didn’t feel like he was working. He was wearing one of his light gray suits and a green shirt sans tie. His hands rested in his lap, eyes on the red rose that he’d brought.

When his date arrived, he had only moments to prepare. The waiter stepped into his vision, motioned for his date to take a seat, he took a deep breath and then looked up. And of all the things he’d been expecting, this was certainly not one of them.

“Hotch?” Reid asked, confusion and a little bit of awe on his face as he sat down across from him. He had dressed up. A striking black suit with a vest, a dark blue shirt and a red tie. He was holding a pink rose.

“Reid,” Hotch answered, after he was done looking Reid over of course.

“What are you doing here?” they both asked at the same time, causing them both to smile. Hotch motioned for Reid to go first.

“Morgan convinced me that I needed to come here. He said I needed to get out and have some fun,” Reid explained, twirling the rose between his fingers.

“Rossi said something similar. He has Jack, Henry and Michael at his place,” Hotch said.

“Hm. Do you think they planned this?” Reid asked.

“Why would they do that? Or better yet how?” Hotch asked, thinking for a bit.

The waiter came back then and asked for their drink orders, laying menus on the table. Both men asked for coffee and a glass of water.

As Hotch thought in silence, Reid squirmed a bit in his seat.

“What is it, Reid?” Hotch asked, noticing the discomfort.

“It’s just…are we actually going to go through with the date?” Reid asked.

Hotch stopped cold. He hadn’t even thought about that. He had just assumed that they would, but if it made Reid uncomfortable he wasn’t going to make him. “Oh, I’m sorry. I had thought we would, but if you don’t want to…” Hotch started, Reid cut him off before he could finish.

“I do…want to, that is. But I wasn’t sure if you did. Or if we were just having dinner as friends. That’s a little odd on Valentine’s Day, isn’t it?” Reid implored, looking into his eyes.

Hotch nodded. “I’ve been attracted to you for some time now, Reid,” he confessed. His heart was pounding at finally saying it aloud.

Reid smiled, a little shyly but happily. “Good, that’s good. I’m attracted to you too,” he said and grimaced a little at how it came out sounding.

Hotch just laughed slightly. He thought it was rather adorable how nervous Reid got on dates.

“Well, then perhaps we should start over? I’m Spencer and I brought this for you,” Reid said, holding out the rose.

“Reid, are we really…” Hotch started.

“I don’t know why you’re calling me ‘Reid.’ I just told you my name is Spencer.” Reid just grinned back at him.

“Spencer…” Hotch started, putting emphasis on the name, “Are we really going to pretend like we don’t know each other?” he asked.

“Of course not. Just play along and then we can go back to profiling our friends,” Reid said, motioning for him to go on.

Hotch sighed but smiled indulgently, he really did care for this man. “How do you do, I’m Aaron,” he said.

“It’s a pleasure to meet you, Aaron,” Reid said, lips curling around the syllables of his first name, causing his pulse to pick up. “Is that for me?” Reid asked, pointing at Hotch’s rose.

Hotch smiled, picked up the knife resting on the table and cut off most of the stem of the red rose. "Lean forward,” he said and waited for Reid to do so before he put the red rose in Reid’s button hole. He repeated the process for the pink rose and put it in his own.

When he looked up, he noticed Reid raking his eyes over him, taking in his appearance. He felt his cheeks heat. “Like what you see?” he asked, raising an eyebrow.

“Very much so,” Reid answered and they both shared a laugh over the ridiculousness of the whole situation.

They perused the menu and ordered before getting back to the topic of how they’d gotten there in the first place.

“Morgan came up to me, said that he knew the woman who owned the place and set it up for me because he knew how I’d been feeling lately and thought I needed to get out and have some fun,” Reid recounted, sipping at his coffee.

“Rossi came in, told me he was going to have Jack, Henry and Michael over so that JJ, Will and I could have a night out. He said I needed to relieve a little tension and to do it as a favor to him,” Hotch said, recalling the conversation.

“To me, it sounds like they planned it. Morgan made sure to mention that he knew what I’d been feeling, and that was attraction to you,” Reid said, tapping his fingers on the table in thought.

“Dave made sure to mention that Jack and Henry had planned to spend the night, which would mean I have the whole night free. And, he asked me to do it as a favor to him. I’ve been pretty obvious about my affection for you. He probably noticed and couldn’t take my, well the only word for it would be pining,” Hotch said, leaning an elbow on the table and resting his chin on it.

“So, how did they purposefully match our answers up?” Reid asked.

“You said Morgan knew the owner. And Dave would pay a small fortune to see that it was carried out if that didn’t work,” Hotch said before taking a bite and chewing thoughtfully now that their dinner had arrived.

“So, what do we do?” Reid asked, already getting a smirk on his face.

“Well, first we should enjoy our date. And then, we get revenge,” Hotch said with an answering smirk.

 

They enjoyed their meal. Hotch insisted on paying for it, but Reid slipped a few bills into Hotch’s suit jacket. They took a walk through the park, just spending time together, talking about whatever came to mind. And, even though they both had empty homes to go to, they decided it would be best to part for the evening. It was only their first date after all. Hotch walked Reid to his car and leaned in to give him a soft kiss. It was Reid who deepened it, pulling Hotch in by his neck and kissing him until they were both breathless.

They parted with plans for revenge the following morning and dinner after work. Neither of them able to stop smiling the entire way home.

* * *

 

They agreed that Reid would set the precedent for what happened. He knew exactly how to play Morgan within a few moments of talking with him. Though, as a baseline they were both going to act a little awkward around each other. Not too much, but they would act like they didn’t want to be alone together or too close. Just little things that would be immediately noticeable. They could be interpreted in any number of ways, and it was Reid’s job to determine in which before they could move on to phase two.

Reid was getting coffee when Morgan walked into the BAU office. Hotch had been lying in wait. As soon as he saw Morgan, he went into the kitchenette. When Reid saw him enter, he smiled awkwardly, nodded and walked out quickly. Morgan followed.

“Hey, Pretty Boy. How was the date?” Morgan asked. He seemed pleased, as if in that short exchange with Hotch he knew things had gone according to plan.

“It was fine,” he said evasively, trying to bait Morgan into revealing more.

“Come on, man. Details! Was she pretty? Did the personality test match you to the type of woman you usually go for? Did you take her home? Seems like you had a late night” Morgan said, perching on the edge of his desk.

Reid blinked owlishly up at him. At first he thought that Morgan was overcompensating by referring to his date as a “she.” However, as he analyzed his speech patterns and vocal fluctuation, it was evident that Morgan truly did think he’d been matched with a woman, and he needed to reanalyze their whole approach to the revenge.

“Not my usual type, no, but more amazing than I could’ve ever expected,” he answered carefully. It was all true. Hotch wasn’t his usual type, but he definitely had been surprised and pleased to see him there.

“That’s great! Are you going to see her again?” Morgan asked. And that clinched it in Reid’s mind. He seemed thrilled. There was no way that Morgan had planned it. If his intention was to set them up, he would’ve been disappointed.

“I suppose you could say that,” Reid replied.

Morgan slapped him on the back and headed out to his office.

Reid pulled out his phone.

_Morgan had no idea. He thought I had been matched up with a woman and seemed pleased about that. Why would he mention that he knew what I was feeling?_

**_I’m not sure. Rossi just got in. I’ll see what he knows. Maybe it was his grand scheme and Morgan wasn’t in on it. Bring me a file in 5 minutes._ **

* * *

 

Hotch was working on a report when Rossi entered. He sat down, steepled his fingers and waited for Hotch to give him his attention.

Reid knocked moments later. He stepped in and walked over to Hotch who held out his hand, not looking up. “Thanks, Reid,” he said once the file was in his hand. He nodded, making eye contact briefly before returning to his task.

When Hotch glanced up, Rossi had a self-satisfied smirk on his face. “Something you need, Dave?” he asked.

“My evening was fine, thanks for asking. After finding something both of the BAU progenies would eat and playing a two hour long game of ‘how long can we hide from Uncle Dave’, I finally passed out on the couch. How did your evening go?” Rossi asked.

Hotch shrugged. “It was okay,” he said.

“Just okay?” Rossi asked.

Based on the facts they’d already collected, Hotch made an educated guess. “She was nice,” he continued, signing another document.

“Please, spare me the details. Haven’t you ever heard the expression, ‘don’t kiss and tell’?” Rossi asked sarcastically.

Hotch raised his eyebrows incredulously. “Why does it matter so much?” he asked.

“Because I want to know what she was like. She must have been something to get you over the mood you’ve been in,” Rossi said.

“And what mood is that, Dave?” he asked.

“Come on, Aaron. We all work so closely together. You think I didn’t notice?” Rossi asked, getting a little testy now. He looked pointedly out into the bull pen.

“Okay, so you thought the blind date was going to solve that how exactly?” Hotch asked, leaning back in his chair.

“You needed to get over it, and obviously it worked,” Rossi said.

Hotch could hardly believe it. “I have a lot of work to get done, Dave,” he said, trying to keep anger off his face and project tired annoyance.

Rossi got the hint and left in a huff, which was just fine by him.

**_Janitor’s closet. 5 minutes._ **

_Are you propositioning me?_

Hotch laughed slightly. **_Maybe._**

_I’ll be there._

He fixed a few things and then went off down the hall. He inconspicuously checked the area before going inside and locking the door when he saw Reid leaning against the wall. He stepped forward and pressed their lips together for a moment.

“Oh, you were serious?” Reid asked and moved closer.

Hotch smiled briefly and gently pushed him back. “Maybe some other time. I just needed to calm down for a second. Rossi planned it so that I’d move on. He wanted me to go on a date so I’d get over my feelings for you,” he explained, brushing Reid’s hair away from his face.

Reid paused, looked down and to the side as he replayed his conversation with Morgan. “I think that was Morgan’s intention too. He saw us act weird in the kitchen this morning and then asked me about the woman I was with. He must have thought I needed to get over my feelings,” he said, nodding slightly with his brow furrowed. Then he looked up and pulled Hotch into another kiss.

They pulled back and thought about the issue, forming a new plan, whispering ideas back and forth. They kissed once more before going back to their jobs.

* * *

 

The plan wasn’t set into motion until the very end of the day. They were both finished with their work and planned to head to Hotch’s apartment for dinner with Jack.

Hotch called Morgan and Rossi up to his office. When they got there, they were met with two big piles of files.

“Morgan. Rossi. I have jobs for you. We found some boxes that no one knew about. There are cold cases and prisoner profiles that need to be assessed and entered into our database. And I’m designating you two to take care of it,” he said.

They were both speechless for a moment. “Why not make Reid and Garcia do it? Reid is faster and Garcia is much better at computers,” Morgan said, though there was a wariness to his tone.

“Well, Garcia didn’t mess with my personal life, and I’m afraid Reid is going to be very busy in the near future,” Hotch said, grabbing his coat and briefcase just as Reid stepped into his office.

“Aaron, you ready?” Reid asked, walking over and putting an arm around Hotch’s waist.

“I’ll be down in one minute,” he answered, handing the keys to his car over to Reid and kissing his cheek.

Reid then gave a meaningful look to the other two men and walked out.

Hotch turned back, taking note of the baffled expressions. “The next time you two intend to stick your noses where they don’t belong, I’d consider the consequences,” Hotch said with a serious expression, “Enjoy your evening. Though, I can say with absolute certainty that my night will be much better than yours,” Hotch said, grinning broadly and following Reid down the stairs and towards the elevator.

He threw an arm around Reid’s waist as they waited for the elevator to reach their floor.

“How long do you think it’ll take them to notice that we only put six actual cases in there and the rest are just folders full of blank paper?” Reid asked, turning into Hotch’s hold just a little more.

“Well, I give them at least half an hour of griping. Then another half hour of them discussing each of their plans. An hour for their first file each because they’ll take breaks to complain, make coffee and various other things. And if they haven’t texted us by then I’ll make sure to text and ask about their progress,” Hotch said as they stepped onto the elevator.

“You know, we really should be thanking them. They helped us get together,” Reid reasoned.

“By attempting to set us up with strangers,” Hotch grumbled.

“I’m just saying, worse things could’ve happened,” Reid said.

“Mmhmm, they could’ve decided the way to get our minds of each other would be a date with them,” Hotch suggested.

Reid cringed and Hotch laughed. “It’s not funny. I have an eidetic memory and now it’s filled with images of me on a date with Morgan,” Reid said with a shudder.

“Hmm, imagine all the pet names he’d have for you if you were dating,” Hotch said, leading them out into the parking garage.

“Hotch! Stop or you’re sleeping on the couch,” Reid complained.

“In my own apartment?” Hotch asked.

“Yes, in your own apartment. Don’t think I can’t make you,” Reid said, though the playfulness in his voice ruined the threat. As they shut the doors to Hotch’s car, he pulled the younger man into a kiss.

Hotch smiled at him when they pulled back. “I would never doubt your ability to do so…Pretty Boy,” Hotch said and started laughing wildly.

“Can someone be in the doghouse even before a proper relationship has started? Because if so, consider yourself there,” Reid said, pouting and crossing his arms.

“I’m sorry, how can I make it up to you?” Hotch asked, tone only partially serious.

“You can’t. Our relationship is forever ruined because you couldn’t leave well enough alone,” Reid said, tilting his head up and away dramatically.

“What if I said I was making your favorite for dinner…and I got Garcia to hack into my webcam and record Morgan and Rossi’s reaction?” Hotch offered, not having shared that detail before.

Reid turned, a smile curling up his lips. “I think I could forgive you for that,” Reid said and Hotch reached over to link their hands together.

* * *

 

Several hours later, after a wonderful dinner and night spent with Jack, Hotch and Reid were curled up together in bed, just talking and kissing when they felt like it. Absorbing the comfort brought by casual physical affection Then, Hotch’s phone vibrated on the bedside table. He reached over and unlocked it to see a text from Dave.

_I hope you know, this means war._

**_Bring it on. I doubt you’d have to remind Morgan about the last time he was engaged in a prank war with Reid._ **

_…I’d like to reconsider my options. Truce?_

**_Luckily, you caught me in a good mood. We will accept your surrender._ **

_You know you’re unbearable when you’re like this. I think I’m getting a cavity._

**_Are you trying to start something?_ **

_All right. I’m done. Get some sleep. I’m just glad, the kid makes you happy, that’s all I really wanted to accomplish. You know that right?_

**_I know, Dave. I don’t appreciate your methods, but your results were pretty impressive._ **

Hotch put his phone on the table then, and turned back to Reid who had fallen asleep. He removed the younger man’s glasses and then curled in behind him, thinking about how glad he was they’d both gone out on Valentine’s Day. And that maybe there was some credence to those personality tests after all.


End file.
